THE NON-ANGELIC LIFE

Text message from one of my BFF... . Actually I do not celebrate Hari Raya, the Islamic Festive Season since 2003..after my bf, Andy died of brain tumour.. . This year it makes more grandeur as on 7th Ramadhan, I decided to convert out of Islam. Yes! I no longer a Muslim. I am yet to declare it officially to the gov..do I need to do so? Not sure. Will check later. . Told my eldest sister - she DOES NOT support this decision of mine..nowadays as long as I do not mention of me being non-Muslim, my eldest will communicate normally..she just pretended that her lil sister is still a Muslim.. . As for my mother - she has DEMENTIA..what I told her, she forgotten the next minute..easy as that. For her, I just did what a daughter meant to do. I just respect her wishes to have great foods & goodies on Hari Raya..so, just cook it for her! . Harlem - he's like my eldest sister..As long as I do not mention about me being non-Muslim, he just play along. . ...

. Cooking for my Muslim parents..All HALAL in my parents' house. This is inconjunction with Eid Ul Adha tomorrow..Last year 2019 and this year 2020, no sacrificing of cow or goat due to this Islamic festive season..by my mother (and me when I was still a Muslim)..like years before..My mother indeed complaining feeling awkward not sacrificing those mentioned animals..😔😔😔 . Anyway, worries and sadness aside..shoooo..Here we go..my homemade dishes to eat with Ketupat (Coconut Leaf Rice Cake).. . Ayam Masak Merah (Spicy Red Chicken) . Rendang Daging Lembu (Beef Rendang) . . Both using the instant paste by  Asyura..Taste nice..👍👍No need to think so much what ingredients needed for both dishes..All blended in a packet..just pour into the pot, simmer, put in the meats & simmer until everything cooked..then served..Voila! . Well, I was just plain too lazy to pound or blend any ingredients..start from scratch today..busy thinking of cleaning up....

. The cause of the dispute today..when my own mother BELITTLED and LOOKED DOWN on me..just bcoz I am unmarried. Instead of giving moral support and understandings, my mother chose to CONDEMN me..Thank you for the moment.🖕🖕🖕🖕 . Amongst all humans, why must it be her..the person who brought me into this world?😡😡😡 . I (with other four (4) siblings) will NEVER be GOOD ENOUGH to my mother..Not being judgmental or jealous of my lil sister (too old to be a jealous sibling) but that's the bitter fact I have lived on all these years! Nothing is ever right in my mother's eyes! So be it!😤😤😤 . Well, like it says.. "Most of the times, the closest enemy in your life is not at all a perfect stranger for you to start with!"😏😏😏 . #LifeGoesOn #SearchForNewJob #GetAnotherJob #ApplyOwnFlatAGAIN #NotEzLivingAtOthersHouse

Earlier received a call informing me about a job interview invitation send via email. At first I thought it was the normal job interview but when I retrieved it, I was disappointed. The job interview is via Zoom.. Maybe due to the pandemic, this is the new style of interview. Sad as after few online video recording for job interview, I am no longer like this new trend. But I know that I have to adapt to this new arrangement. With heavy heart, I rejected the job interview invitation. I pray hard that the pandemic will be gone soon as I need a face to face job interview. Looks like it will be a loooooooong time until I get a brand new job..Can I ask for anything right now?! I doubt so. I shall just stop applying for job for a time-being.

Did a 25-mins survey..about healthcare scheme, retirement scheme, housing scheme, security scheme etc. I really emphasized on housing scheme for singles. Surveyor: You mean number of flats not enough? Me: Not that. I just want to highlight that if HDB invites 10 applicants to select flats, MAKE SURE there are 10 flats or more to select..NOT invited 10 applicants but only 5 flats available..like my case - invited me on Friday evening to select flat on next Monday BUT on Sunday evening, HDB informed me that all flats fully booked & asked me to re-join the queue for next launch. More than once I got such "false hope" invitation to select a flat..One miserable choice to have my own flat. That's not a good practise as single people like me hope to have our own flat too..My request only for 2-room flat, NOT 2-storey bungalow. Surveyor: 2-room flat is quite small. Me: It is more than enough for me to stay alone on my own. I dislike living with anoth...

Whenever I heard the song "I'll stand by you" by The Pretenders, I will always be brought back to that day where my world collapsed before my eyes..It was the turning point in my life..It is what made who I am right now.. Just knowing that I am NOT everyone's cup of tea or dash of vodka, I learnt to distance myself from other humans.. Back then, I was sad..nowhere to turn to..then he said,"Just let it out..Just tell me all. Don't be afraid. I am not going to love you less..eventhough your confession will hurt me..I will stand by you..I have been doing that all these years when you felt abandoned by your best friends who left you after getting married, right?".. No matter how I always bully him..No matter how loud I screamed at him..Each time I said,"I hate you!" when I was pissed off with him..He always replied,"No need to tell the world..The world already knows that I love you no matter what you say"..🙄🙄🙄😡😡😡 ...

Saturday, 11 July 2020 at 6pm, I heard some noise outside my bedroom so, I came out and asked my mom what had happened..that's when she told me that she wanted to eat satay..I was like "WHAT?! At this hour? Are you sure?"..I texted my brother and my beau to ask whether any of them is available to buy some satay for my mom. At the same time I found it a bit fishy..Just last month I asked my beau to buy satay for her..This was absolutely not right somewhere..As no one was available, I just had a rush shower and zoomed out of the house immediately. I tried to recall where to buy satay..Thanks God I found it nearby. Quickly I ordered. Waited around 20 minutes before my order was ready and I rushed home. Once I reached home, I quickly served the foods. I told my mom to finish all the satay as she was the one demanding it in the first place. I felt ANNOYED! Sunday, 12 July 2020..I told my mom that she DOES NOT need to cover my daddy ridiculous request. "No matter how y...

In the midst of Phase Two of CoVid-19 Pandemic, Singapore held its GE 2020. For great safety of voters, senior generation above 65 years old were allocated the most earliest voting time slot from 8am to 12pm. My parents were allocated time slot from 9am to 11am. Voters aged below 65 years old were allocated time slot from 12pm to 8pm. I was given time slot from 5pm to 7pm. ACTUAL POLLING DAY' STRUGGLES Since last night I have reminded my parents to prepare for polling day. Advised my mom to take off all her jewelleries as she will need to put on plastic gloves at the polling center and puts off adult diaper as I do not know how long the process of viting will be. My mom did took off all her jewelleries but when we were about to go out of the house and asked her whether she puts on adult diaper, she did not do so. I jumped. I nagged. I was frustrated when no one listened! My mom retaliated by saying that she's not going to vote. I told her off that I will informed...